This week has been chock-full of socially awkward experiences. One, two lessons have been learned:
1) It is not necessarily better to run away from an awkward situation. Oftentimes, it is better to explain the misunderstanding that led up to the awkward situation.
My friend Kate hosted a birthday/housewarming party, and I found myself hanging out around the hors d'oeuvre table a lot (because no one puts together a party spread quite like Kate does, and also I'm kind of a pig). There were some particularly tasty morsels at one corner of the table, which was wedged against a wall and another corner. Another partygoer, who I assumed was my friend Joanna, was standing in that rather closed-off corner and, being the rude party-food-table-grazer that I am, I reached past her to grab some dip. Thinking that it was my friend Joanna, I decided to make a little joke about how I was sort of crowding her (to be fair, I was only kinda crowding her at that point). So I stepped in about a foot closer - about 6 inches closer than comfortable when standing next to someone - and made some mocking joke about stealing her personal space. I looked up and realized, to my chagrin, that it was not Joanna. It was not, unfortunately, anyone that I actually knew, but was instead a rather scared-looking hipster (and is there anything more sad than a frightened hipster?).
Did I explain that I was joking and that I'd thought she was someone else? No, I did not. Instead I turned on my heel and ran away. The poor scared-looking hipster maintained a wary distance from me for the rest of the evening. The lesson learned is twofold: a) don't make jokes about personal space unless you're absolutely sure you know who you're joking with, and b) it's probably better to explain the misunderstanding so that a complete stranger doesn't leave a party convinced you're a potential serial killer.
2) When picking out your WiFi passwords, it's best to keep it clean.
My Mormon mother-in-law, Sandra, watches Charlotte while I'm at work on Thursdays and Fridays. Our central air system had to be replaced last week, and Sandra was at our house with the baby while the repairmen were working. The new HVAC has a fancy digital thingamabobber, and the repairmen asked for our WiFi password to finish setting everything up.
With the repairmen standing in front of her, expectantly waiting, Sandra called my husband to find out the password.
My husband cringed, and told her what it was: a rather odd combination of sexually-explicit expletives*, which I'd personally picked out a couple years before (because I wanted to be able to remember it, people! For some reason, dirty words are easier for me to remember than a birthday or the name of my dog + the year I was born).
So... blushing furiously, my poor Mormon mother in law had to tell two AC repairmen what our dirty-minded password was. She later told Will she was ashamed to be his mother!
To his credit, Will didn't throw me under the bus. When I got home from work, though, I decided to come clean and confess that I'd chosen the WiFi password and not her son. Right as the words were coming out of my mouth, Sandra interrupted and said: "It was just so JUVENILE, I knew it HAD to be Will."
So I just decided to let it go and not say anything further...
The lesson learned here? I don't know. I still like my WiFi password and now I really won't forget it! Maybe that I should eschew all technology in order to avoid offending people?
What's the likelihood of that ever happening?
*No, I'm not going to tell you what it was. I don't want you stealing my WiFi!